Updated: Aug 25
I read many things, write many things and say many things. I am a writer… it’s what I do. So, how does one confuse a reader on purpose.
There are many ways. I could begin by creating a title that pulls the reader in and gives them an expectation of something but then ultimately write about something different.
Something like, how to know if animals are mating, how to grind someone’s gears or how to keep someone reading your idiotic jargon. Well… those will be posts for another day. Let’s see if I can get you all dazed and confused ← (Great Movie)
Create a Stunning Title: No one is going to read your crap if the title is blander than rice paper. You have to lure them in. Something like — 10 ways to lose your lover, How I made $500 today, where you can go for a free surgery. You know — interesting things.
Find A Confusing picture: Now, you’ve created your title. Make sure the photo you have chosen has NOTHING to do with the title you have shown. The reader will become intrigued and click upon your article. We are simple creatures. So, if you say you’re going to tell me how to get chicks, but your photo has a cartoon apple on it… I’m probably going to open the article to see why.
The content: Think of something close to but not exactly what you suggested in your title. For instance: this article title is “how to confuse a reader” when in actuality… It’s telling you “How to get someone to read your crap” — We’re not 100% off topic. They’ll read your crap because their confused. So, it’s a win-win… for me… and you.
The ending: Make sure that your ending makes no sense and leaves your reader with a confused face that will stun others. Sometimes this can hinder you rather than help though, so make sure it’s in good taste. If the confusion is high — the reader may share your work to confuse others and help themselves not feel so stupid for reading your work in the first place.
Now you know how to feed a donkey. How do you feel? Does it make you want to throw a party? Me too! Let’s do it at your house though… Mine is currently being used as the meeting place for the Hormones of Humanity group.
Remember: This is strictly for comic relief. No one likes a dick, who’s a dick just to be a dick. Stay Safe Everyone!
If you’re looking for more writing tips… Try this book Writing Tools. I’m pretty sure it’s not made to confuse you.
If you enjoyed my work. Buy me a coffee and keep me writing!
🧡Shine Bright, Kayla