Can We Keep Our Clothes On?

Like many of you, I have been caught up in the whirlwind three-ringed circus that is TikTok. A vast majority of lonely housewives/husbands looking to claim their 15 minutes of fame by dressing in their underwear and attempting dance moves similar to what you would see between two animals engaged in coitus on Animal Planet.

Maybe it’s just me, but I keep asking the question,

Can we please keep our clothes on?

Listen, I’m all for you being comfortable in your own skin… I just would rather not see 100% of that skin each time I open my app.

If you would. More power to ya.

I hear that Only Fans is a good place for that type of content… or even Playboy. Although, I’m pretty sure Only Fans is easier to attain placement. Unless of course you have a peg leg and scurvy. Strike that… pretty sure you’d still get accepted. So, give it a shot!

Maybe there’s a part to this that I am just not grasping. Is it now considered classy to present yourself half-naked for the world to see, to wear shirts cut enough that areolas are on the prowl, or skirts so short that if you sneezed the whole universe would see Christmas? If it is, I’m pretty sure I’m going to be even less popular than I originally imagined.

Let it be known,

All of you ladies (and men) are glorious shining balls of gas surrounding the universe. I would just be happier, and less nauseated, if you kept some of your gas out of the spotlight.

Don’t get me wrong.

Not everyone on that platform is an attention-seeking want to be $20 for hire. Hell, even I use the platform… and Kids… Kids use the platform. (With help from parents, but still) So there are a few out there just trying to connect, give some laughs or encouragement or just to fit in.

Round of applause for ya’ll.

But to the 75% of daisy duke wearing, bathing suit trotting and corset cropped individuals taking over this hyped-up fad app… Put some F-ing clothes on.

🧡 Shine Bright, Kayla